Aw. You mean we have to WAIT to find out if the world ends?

And here I was hoping America’s problems might be solved by the entire planet getting sucked into a black hole:

The world’s newest and largest particle accelerator, the Large Hadron Collider, will not begin operations again until April, officials at the European Center for Nuclear Research said Tuesday.

Ah, well.  At least if the world ends in April, Michiganders can slide into the vortex with hope for the Detroit Lions.