What If They Threw A Convention and No One Came?

I woke up this morning to the thought — it may have been in a dream — that no one will watch the GOP convention.

We know this election is a referendum on Obama. Voters are deciding if they like him. If they don’t, the safe pick is the crusty old white dude. So obviously people will watch the Dem convention, which will benefit from an exciting candidate, a dynamic history-making acceptance speech, potential Clinton drama, and general excitement about turning the page on the Bush years.

But non one really wants to watch the McCain speech, because it doesn’t really matter what McCain says. He’s just the alternative if Obama proves unpalatable. Plus, dozens of Republican candidates — including Liddy Dole and others — are staying away from the convention on the advice of the GOP, so as not to hurt their re-election prospects by getting accidentally photographed next to Cheney.

Finally, Bush and Cheney are giving their speeches on Monday, which is Labor Day, when everyone will be out of town. And now I see that McCain’s closing night speech will be given on the night of the NFL season opener.

Do they publish the ratings for the conventions? Because I have a feeling that almost everyone watching the proceedings in Minneapolis will be on the GOP payroll in one way or another.